








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 792 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 388 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Esplay | 16 matches | 1,946 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5333 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,274 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3114 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2730 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4883 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 3547 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,486,035 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antiboa aka Jeff Seid | 54% | 311 |
| #2 | Ocke | 52% | 73 |
| #3 | Wapic | 50% | 243 |
| #4 | <StigL> | 49% | 194 |
| #5 | -Shaylse | 49% | 193 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antiboa aka Jeff Seid | 54% | 311 |
| #2 | Ocke | 52% | 73 |
| #3 | Wapic | 50% | 243 |
| #4 | <StigL> | 49% | 194 |
| #5 | -Shaylse | 49% | 193 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antiboa aka Jeff Seid | 38 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | <StigL> | 21 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Wapic | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Ocke | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | -Shaylse | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antiboa aka Jeff Seid | 872 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | Wapic | 815 | 0.16 | 26 min |
| #3 | -Shaylse | 444 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #4 | Ocke | 267 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #5 | <StigL> | 264 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antiboa aka Jeff Seid | +2.02 | 72 | 67 |
| #2 | Wapic | +0.74 | 81 | 65 |
| #3 | <DraveL> | +0.37 | 73 | 58 |
| #4 | <StigL> | -0.20 | 64 | 59 |
| #5 | Ocke | -0.53 | 76 | 66 |





