










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3426 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,507 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4328 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5023 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2591 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2565 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,731,905 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KAISER | 56% | 32 |
| #2 | gummiBaeR | 56% | 100 |
| #3 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | amg enjoyer | 50% | 36 |
| #5 | TheHero1994 | 44% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ponglenis | 9 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 6 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | Lama | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | gummiBaeR | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | TheHero1994 | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ponglenis | 249 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | KKS | 179 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #3 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | 136 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #4 | gummiBaeR | 106 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | TheHero1994 | 100 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S1BO☜☯☞[GER] | +4.76 | 87 | 70 |
| #2 | amg enjoyer | +2.01 | 78 | 50 |
| #3 | gummiBaeR | +1.51 | 67 | 60 |
| #4 | TheHero1994 | +0.97 | 63 | 66 |
| #5 | Yumai | +0.92 | 64 | 49 |





