










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 506 matches | ||
| Faceit | 129 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 90 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8588 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,605 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4899 | 20% |
| Smokes | 7739 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5229 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6738 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,165,338 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 781 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Long_Rough_Dab_40cm | 61% | 51 |
| #2 | Komodo | 58% | 66 |
| #3 | 𝕹𝖊𝖗𝖔 | 56% | 82 |
| #4 | P-Nes | 56% | 66 |
| #5 | MajorFletch | 54% | 238 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 𝕹𝖊𝖗𝖔 | 56% | 82 |
| #4 | P-Nes | 56% | 66 |
| #5 | MajorFletch | 54% | 238 |
| #6 | 平-HuNTeR-和 | 52% | 44 |
| #7 | Darkspark | 52% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Darkspark | 11 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | MajorFletch | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | 平-HuNTeR-和 | 5 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | 𝕹𝖊𝖗𝖔 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Komodo | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MajorFletch | 1382 | 0.28 | 36 min |
| #2 | Darkspark | 307 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | P-Nes | 292 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #4 | 𝕹𝖊𝖗𝖔 | 228 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | 平-HuNTeR-和 | 184 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Long_Rough_Dab_40cm | +2.60 | 91 | 49 |
| #2 | 平-HuNTeR-和 | +2.53 | 75 | 76 |
| #3 | 67 adr demon | +1.49 | 88 | 62 |
| #4 | Darkspark | +0.69 | 63 | 49 |
| #5 | Komodo | +0.66 | 78 | 59 |





