








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 549 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 137 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2561 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2312 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2043 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1996 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1921 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,141,343 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ikke | 55% | 20 |
| #2 | :))) | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | ItsMarius. | 51% | 216 |
| #4 | matzø | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | Tobikarli | 49% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Treyez | 11 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | ItsMarius. | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | iquuH | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | matzø | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Tobikarli | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ItsMarius. | 850 | 0.19 | 26 min |
| #2 | iquuH | 351 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #3 | matzø | 129 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Treyez | 111 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | :))) | 102 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :))) | +5.29 | 89 | 77 |
| #2 | iquuH | +5.25 | 86 | 80 |
| #3 | Ikke | +0.82 | 59 | 51 |
| #4 | ItsMarius. | -0.41 | 61 | 80 |
| #5 | matzø | -0.60 | 78 | 63 |





