








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2542 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 124 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5674 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,775 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1816 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2275 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2602 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1082 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,837,113 of utility $273 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 981 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⍩ | 84% | 50 |
| #2 | kyuxi | 83% | 30 |
| #3 | kapi1368 | 82% | 61 |
| #4 | Moustache Baby | 79% | 24 |
| #5 | Hannah | 60% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | kyuxi | 83% | 30 |
| #3 | kapi1368 | 82% | 61 |
| #4 | Moustache Baby | 79% | 24 |
| #5 | Hannah | 60% | 20 |
| #6 | Kenpachi0367 | 59% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kyuxi | 7 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | Moustache Baby | 6 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | kapi1368 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | ⍩ | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Kenpachi0367 | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapi1368 | 126 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | ⍩ | 102 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Moustache Baby | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kenpachi0367 | 21 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | kyuxi | 21 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5000hrs on Nuke | +7.33 | 89 | 47 |
| #2 | kapi1368 | +4.05 | 88 | 60 |
| #3 | ⍩ | +0.50 | 74 | 50 |
| #4 | Moustache Baby | -0.61 | 68 | 61 |
| #5 | kyuxi | -3.05 | 62 | 27 |





