








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 144 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5462 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3957 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3368 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3612 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4007 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,361,070 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1006 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kob | 62% | 34 |
| #2 | _Killable_ | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Hayden | 54% | 72 |
| #4 | ♥ bungy ♥ | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Paniic Blossom | 51% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | _Killable_ | 55% | 44 |
| #3 | Hayden | 54% | 72 |
| #4 | ♥ bungy ♥ | 52% | 50 |
| #5 | Paniic Blossom | 51% | 100 |
| #6 | Amos Kingsnake | 41% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hayden | 11 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | ♥ bungy ♥ | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | _Killable_ | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Paniic Blossom | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | kob | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kob | 81 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #2 | _Killable_ | 79 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Amos Kingsnake | 71 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | ♥ bungy ♥ | 68 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Paniic Blossom | 34 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ bungy ♥ | +2.22 | 90 | 44 |
| #2 | Paniic Blossom | +1.31 | 78 | 28 |
| #3 | Teshyrr | +1.07 | 66 | 49 |
| #4 | Amos Kingsnake | +0.57 | 44 | 53 |
| #5 | Hayden | -0.11 | 50 | 26 |





