








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1821 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,141 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 770 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1395 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 913 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1063 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $494,857 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 546 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | kilppari | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | b94K jugginbrixz | 55% | 95 |
| #4 | ♰ ℮ki | 49% | 73 |
| #5 | Mr täti | 48% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | k | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | kilppari | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | b94K jugginbrixz | 55% | 95 |
| #4 | ♰ ℮ki | 49% | 73 |
| #5 | Mr täti | 48% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♰ ℮ki | 16 | 0.0113 |
| #2 | b94K jugginbrixz | 15 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | kilppari | 11 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | Mr täti | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | k | 1 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♰ ℮ki | 300 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #2 | b94K jugginbrixz | 177 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Mr täti | 174 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | kilppari | 167 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | k | 37 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kilppari | +3.72 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | mujahideen | +1.78 | 84 | 54 |
| #3 | Mr täti | +0.91 | 62 | 75 |
| #4 | ♰ ℮ki | -0.68 | 83 | 57 |
| #5 | k | -0.76 | 73 | 66 |





