








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 246 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 170 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2332 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,889 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2661 | 34% |
| Smokes | 713 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 2375 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2140 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,310,000 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 137 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tatska | 24 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Andrew | 22 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Catboy Criminal (=ʘᆽʘ=)∫ | 12 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | JonnyTwoHorses | 8 | 0.0119 |
| #5 | Ebun | 4 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andrew | 576 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #2 | Catboy Criminal (=ʘᆽʘ=)∫ | 478 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | tatska | 176 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | ntimidate | 131 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | NooReTos | 107 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andrew | +4.64 | 58 | 74 |
| #2 | Ebun | +4.35 | 83 | 43 |
| #3 | tatska | +3.84 | 82 | 35 |
| #4 | NooReTos | +2.35 | 48 | 65 |
| #5 | Catboy Criminal (=ʘᆽʘ=)∫ | +1.92 | 77 | 52 |





