








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 309 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1641 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,184 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1083 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1685 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1079 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1337 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $456,752 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 133 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TIMO | 72% | 29 |
| #2 | ALY | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | bandit.gg | 52% | 29 |
| #4 | Chops | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | A1marsss | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ALY | 57% | 35 |
| #3 | bandit.gg | 52% | 29 |
| #4 | Chops | 50% | 14 |
| #5 | A1marsss | 50% | 16 |
| #6 | Killerboy420 | 50% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Killerboy420 | 8 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | TIMO | 8 | 0.0144 |
| #3 | A1marsss | 7 | 0.0246 |
| #4 | ALY | 5 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | bandit.gg | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Killerboy420 | 125 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | Chops | 59 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | A1marsss | 58 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | TIMO | 41 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | ALY | 21 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A1marsss | +5.88 | 85 | 65 |
| #2 | Chops | +2.53 | 76 | 73 |
| #3 | Killerboy420 | +2.53 | 85 | 58 |
| #4 | manners | +1.39 | 69 | 61 |
| #5 | ALY | -0.06 | 63 | 34 |





