








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4665 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,615 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4286 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3611 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3491 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3227 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $550,658 of utility $61 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Markus Rühl | 15 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Frederic der Butler | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | EggPlant | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | fabwe | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | J0eY | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frederic der Butler | 844 | 0.24 | 19 min |
| #2 | Markus Rühl | 583 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | EggPlant | 451 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #4 | fabwe | 340 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | B ü m m e l z | 166 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | howling | +3.17 | 90 | 73 |
| #2 | B ü m m e l z | +2.11 | 71 | 68 |
| #3 | EggPlant | +1.86 | 80 | 58 |
| #4 | fabwe | +1.79 | 90 | 67 |
| #5 | inbroso | +1.69 | 79 | 63 |





