








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,223 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 787 | 35% |
| Smokes | 584 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 577 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 275 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $203,624 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 190 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vorst | 47% | 51 |
| #2 | Pr0tal | 45% | 22 |
| #3 | Eold | 45% | 51 |
| #4 | Joe | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | artisiole | 42% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Eold | 45% | 51 |
| #4 | Joe | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | artisiole | 42% | 55 |
| #6 | Stock | 40% | 70 |
| #7 | El Korgus | 25% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joe | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | artisiole | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | El Korgus | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Eold | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Stock | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stock | 234 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Vorst | 146 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | El Korgus | 138 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Eold | 98 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Joe | 81 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eold | +2.59 | 64 | 50 |
| #2 | Vorst | +1.37 | 63 | 58 |
| #3 | Joe | -0.19 | 60 | 32 |
| #4 | El Korgus | -0.38 | 56 | 38 |
| #5 | Stock | -0.46 | 37 | 57 |





