








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 264 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1944 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,164 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1861 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1654 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1179 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1470 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $507,526 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Pave | 42% | 71 |
| #7 | ♥𝐿𝒾𝒾𝓃𝒶♥ | 41% | 56 |
| #8 | Nitropotato | 34% | 58 |
| #9 | JuhnuTuhnu69 | 25% | 24 |
| #10 | Vale | 23% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pave | 12 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | 60hz Pavee69 | 10 | 0.0368 |
| #3 | Nitropotato | 7 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Vale | 6 | 0.0144 |
| #5 | ♥𝐿𝒾𝒾𝓃𝒶♥ | 5 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pave | 280 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #2 | Fuckyourlife | 151 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | ♥𝐿𝒾𝒾𝓃𝒶♥ | 147 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Koskenkorva | 117 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Nitropotato | 86 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fuckyourlife | +4.58 | 79 | 58 |
| #2 | Koskenkorva | +2.30 | 64 | 54 |
| #3 | lasauttaja | +0.51 | 80 | 59 |
| #4 | Pave | +0.11 | 58 | 65 |
| #5 | 60hz Pavee69 | -0.47 | 54 | 60 |





