










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 70 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,827 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 598 | 33% |
| Smokes | 432 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 428 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 369 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,405 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drow | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Keef | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | BrokenR3cord | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | Weed | 67% | 21 |
| #5 | SOGPAPADIG | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drow | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Keef | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | BrokenR3cord | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | Weed | 67% | 21 |
| #5 | SOGPAPADIG | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weed | 15 | 0.0351 |
| #2 | SOGPAPADIG | 3 | 0.0134 |
| #3 | Keef | 3 | 0.0303 |
| #4 | BrokenR3cord | 2 | 0.0078 |
| #5 | Drow | 1 | 0.0175 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Weed | 60 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | BrokenR3cord | 56 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #3 | SOGPAPADIG | 21 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | Keef | 10 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | Drow | 8 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I forgor :D | +7.18 | 73 | 84 |
| #2 | Drow | +6.02 | 90 | 68 |
| #3 | BrokenR3cord | +3.04 | 83 | 52 |
| #4 | Weed | +1.26 | 67 | 62 |
| #5 | Keef | +0.57 | 51 | 53 |





