








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 137 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1294 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 715 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1702 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 904 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 652 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $465,304 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 348 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonas | 51% | 49 |
| #2 | SALVATAGGIO | 48% | 25 |
| #3 | FlugHeli | 47% | 15 |
| #4 | rowie | 45% | 51 |
| #5 | c0nr | 43% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonas | 51% | 49 |
| #2 | SALVATAGGIO | 48% | 25 |
| #3 | FlugHeli | 47% | 15 |
| #4 | rowie | 45% | 51 |
| #5 | c0nr | 43% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonas | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | rowie | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | FlugHeli | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | SALVATAGGIO | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0nr | 157 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #2 | Jonas | 117 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | FlugHeli | 58 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | rowie | 50 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | SALVATAGGIO | 33 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rowie | +2.26 | 62 | 50 |
| #2 | c0nr | +1.39 | 48 | 60 |
| #3 | Jonas | -0.71 | 31 | 54 |
| #4 | SALVATAGGIO | -0.94 | 39 | 45 |
| #5 | rt® | -0.95 | 25 | 43 |





