








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 210 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 392 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3854 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,451 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2490 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4442 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3587 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2932 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,769,485 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 350 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hetfigadrücker | 57% | 51 |
| #2 | FlugHeli | 53% | 246 |
| #3 | Jonas | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | SirHalker | 51% | 127 |
| #5 | Froschhuhn | 51% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FlugHeli | 18 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | hetfigadrücker | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Ich verkauf mein Team | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Froschhuhn | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Jonas | 4 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FlugHeli | 653 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | CERTIFIED BOTTOM FRAGGER ツ | 195 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #3 | Ich verkauf mein Team | 120 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Froschhuhn | 110 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | Jonas | 92 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Froschhuhn | +3.33 | 58 | 57 |
| #2 | hetfigadrücker | +1.35 | 54 | 53 |
| #3 | SALVATAGGIO | +1.13 | 49 | 45 |
| #4 | Jonas | +0.65 | 42 | 57 |
| #5 | Ich verkauf mein Team | -0.37 | 64 | 51 |





