










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 437 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4253 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2363 | 20% |
| Smokes | 4334 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 2103 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2809 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,564,553 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2886 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flareon | 45% | 40 |
| #2 | someonehere27 | 43% | 42 |
| #3 | ElbY | 41% | 54 |
| #4 | puppyboy | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flareon | 45% | 40 |
| #2 | someonehere27 | 43% | 42 |
| #3 | ElbY | 41% | 54 |
| #4 | puppyboy | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puppyboy | 14 | 0.0163 |
| #2 | ElbY | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | someonehere27 | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Flareon | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puppyboy | 95 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | ElbY | 73 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | someonehere27 | 21 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Flareon | 3 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElbY | +2.77 | 44 | 44 |
| #2 | Espeon | +0.88 | 28 | 33 |
| #3 | puppyboy | -0.31 | 25 | 44 |
| #4 | someonehere27 | -0.60 | 35 | 28 |
| #5 | Flareon | -3.77 | 15 | 6 |





