








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 639 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 61 matches | ||
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,993 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3242 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2809 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2931 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3011 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,086,131 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boyaux Rouges | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | DrakeDraw | 61% | 119 |
| #3 | Black ♠Jack✟Fury☯ | 59% | 97 |
| #4 | Zer0_M | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | Pépé | 56% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | DrakeDraw | 61% | 119 |
| #3 | Black ♠Jack✟Fury☯ | 59% | 97 |
| #4 | Zer0_M | 56% | 48 |
| #5 | Pépé | 56% | 45 |
| #6 | 𝔔𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔲 | 51% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pépé | 10 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | Black ♠Jack✟Fury☯ | 7 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | 𝔔𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔲 | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | DrakeDraw | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Boyaux Rouges | 2 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DrakeDraw | 403 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | Pépé | 98 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Zer0_M | 89 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | Black ♠Jack✟Fury☯ | 88 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | 𝔔𝔲𝔢𝔢𝔫𝔰𝔬𝔲 | 43 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloamker | +4.90 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | Pépé | +2.43 | 69 | 71 |
| #3 | Black ♠Jack✟Fury☯ | +0.24 | 25 | 30 |
| #4 | Zer0_M | -1.00 | 60 | 57 |
| #5 | DrakeDraw | -2.08 | 45 | 46 |





