








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 144 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,354 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2140 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2154 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1490 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 570 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $291,151 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauce | 46% | 78 |
| #2 | aight, fosho | 44% | 16 |
| #3 | Steven Flow | 42% | 36 |
| #4 | Bananamilk | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauce | 46% | 78 |
| #2 | aight, fosho | 44% | 16 |
| #3 | Steven Flow | 42% | 36 |
| #4 | Bananamilk | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauce | 18 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | aight, fosho | 3 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | Steven Flow | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauce | 202 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | aight, fosho | 49 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | Steven Flow | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bananamilk | 27 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauce | +2.52 | 53 | 56 |
| #2 | aight, fosho | -0.83 | 34 | 60 |
| #3 | Uhhh | -0.96 | 32 | 57 |
| #4 | Steven Flow | -2.56 | 27 | 41 |
| #5 | Bananamilk | -3.13 | 4 | 38 |





