








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 97 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 78 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




201 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4264 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3689 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3339 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4318 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $704,616 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 999 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fartpoop | 65% | 88 |
| #2 | jarren | 63% | 38 |
| #3 | undefine | 60% | 75 |
| #4 | tomoe | 60% | 203 |
| #5 | plexity | 59% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomoe | +5.31 | 90 | 63 |
| #2 | fRENzY | +4.65 | 82 | 70 |
| #3 | fartpoop | +1.88 | 69 | 66 |
| #4 | plexity | +1.62 | 73 | 55 |
| #5 | jarren | +1.39 | 86 | 53 |





