








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 325 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2621 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,581 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2121 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2089 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1370 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2001 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $796,094 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1025 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juusto | 55% | 47 |
| #2 | el papitaano | 49% | 81 |
| #3 | MikkoMonitappo | 49% | 37 |
| #4 | Spequ ϡ | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | eetu | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | el papitaano | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | MikkoMonitappo | 3 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Juusto | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | eetu | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | el papitaano | 199 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | MikkoMonitappo | 87 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Juusto | 77 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | COLDENS #reformed | 33 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | eetu | 23 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juusto | +3.05 | 80 | 54 |
| #2 | eetu | +2.80 | 80 | 59 |
| #3 | näätä #Lättyskii | +1.58 | 71 | 59 |
| #4 | el papitaano | -0.21 | 71 | 64 |
| #5 | COLDENS #reformed | -1.23 | 69 | 57 |





