








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 543 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 212 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,895 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1663 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1561 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1661 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2010 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,209,680 of utility $246 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adze | 60% | 108 |
| #2 | BeastyQT | 57% | 141 |
| #3 | Nukeey | 57% | 188 |
| #4 | Fabe | 56% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adze | 60% | 108 |
| #2 | BeastyQT | 57% | 141 |
| #3 | Nukeey | 57% | 188 |
| #4 | Fabe | 56% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fabe | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | BeastyQT | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Nukeey | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nukeey | 1277 | 0.34 | 42 min |
| #2 | Fabe | 527 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | BeastyQT | 453 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #4 | Adze | 248 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nukeey | +2.16 | 82 | 80 |
| #2 | Adze | +0.89 | 86 | 65 |
| #3 | BeastyQT | +0.04 | 76 | 59 |
| #4 | Fabe | -0.51 | 76 | 61 |
| #5 | Jost | -1.03 | 67 | 54 |





