








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 795 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 239 matches | ||
| Faceit | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4875 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,527 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5012 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4343 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3989 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4183 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,257,137 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jost | 60% | 108 |
| #2 | TPS | 58% | 53 |
| #3 | Fabe | 53% | 182 |
| #4 | BeastyQT | 53% | 215 |
| #5 | Nukeey | 53% | 237 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Nukeey | 53% | 237 |
| #6 | Jymm! ◉ ͟ʖ ◉ | 51% | 65 |
| #7 | W | 50% | 163 |
| #8 | maxipower10 | 49% | 108 |
| #9 | Q-Brick | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeastyQT | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Fabe | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | W | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | maxipower10 | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | TPS | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nukeey | 1570 | 0.31 | 48 min |
| #2 | BeastyQT | 680 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #3 | Fabe | 531 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #4 | W | 376 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #5 | Jost | 204 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W | +1.51 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | Nukeey | +1.26 | 81 | 76 |
| #3 | Adze | +0.83 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | TPS | +0.32 | 72 | 80 |
| #5 | Q-Brick | +0.21 | 77 | 63 |





