










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,204 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 664 | 30% |
| Smokes | 367 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 767 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 406 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $323,652 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | talking tom | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | OO OO AA AA | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | イレイナ | 56% | 45 |
| #4 | DEMONKE | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | kohicino | 52% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | イレイナ | 6 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | kohicino | 5 | 0.0112 |
| #3 | Kido | 3 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | YO DAYO!! | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | winteo-ssi | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YO DAYO!! | 154 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | イレイナ | 90 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Kido | 64 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | winteo-ssi | 46 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | OO OO AA AA | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kohicino | +5.65 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | OO OO AA AA | +3.45 | 63 | 33 |
| #3 | イレイナ | +3.31 | 81 | 54 |
| #4 | Kido | +0.65 | 69 | 40 |
| #5 | eskel | +0.65 | 50 | 47 |





