








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 161 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,209 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 948 | 18% |
| Smokes | 853 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1684 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1724 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $385,196 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H0NeST | 74% | 23 |
| #2 | yobamark | 71% | 52 |
| #3 | kmzbn | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | Levi | 60% | 77 |
| #5 | Apotheosis | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H0NeST | 74% | 23 |
| #2 | yobamark | 71% | 52 |
| #3 | kmzbn | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | Levi | 60% | 77 |
| #5 | Apotheosis | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Levi | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | yobamark | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | H0NeST | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Levi | 193 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | yobamark | 70 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | H0NeST | 36 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Apotheosis | 29 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | kmzbn | 18 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B O B | +3.91 | 95 | 61 |
| #2 | yobamark | +3.80 | 92 | 67 |
| #3 | Levi | +1.17 | 91 | 50 |
| #4 | kmzbn | +1.12 | 94 | 53 |
| #5 | H0NeST | +1.10 | 82 | 52 |





