








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,624 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 929 | 26% |
| Smokes | 721 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1432 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 542 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $395,233 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 170 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nick | 84 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | lore accurate wealthy white man | 47 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #3 | BR8RG | 32 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Hyper | 29 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | InfiniteRyman | 17 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lore accurate wealthy white man | +1.84 | 64 | 37 |
| #2 | AZERØN | +1.71 | 68 | 36 |
| #3 | Nick | +0.68 | 76 | 45 |
| #4 | BR8RG | +0.65 | 39 | 52 |
| #5 | Fake Butter | -0.55 | 55 | 39 |





