








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 409 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1748 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,106 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1517 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1694 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1190 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1705 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $650,625 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRR.- | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | Luigi ******** | 55% | 147 |
| #3 | Zoju | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | ★ RuRal | 50% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRR.- | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | Luigi ******** | 55% | 147 |
| #3 | Zoju | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | ★ RuRal | 50% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luigi ******** | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | ★ RuRal | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Zoju | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luigi ******** | 696 | 0.21 | 19 min |
| #2 | ★ RuRal | 348 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | GRR.- | 180 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #4 | Zoju | 84 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GRR.- | +4.27 | 89 | 75 |
| #2 | Zoju | +0.96 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | ★ RuRal | -0.17 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | Yeetimus-Prime | -0.39 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | Luigi ******** | -0.68 | 82 | 76 |





