








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1685 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




133 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
18014 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,507 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 882 | 5% |
| Smokes | 3726 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5455 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 6444 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,655,306 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 463 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cracky blacks | 71% | 105 |
| #2 | DZIWNY SM@RK NA FIRANCE | 58% | 349 |
| #3 | OneMoreLine | 53% | 285 |
| #4 | Zwoele kerkpastoor | 51% | 230 |
| #5 | 𝔽𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕔 | 51% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | DZIWNY SM@RK NA FIRANCE | 58% | 349 |
| #3 | OneMoreLine | 53% | 285 |
| #4 | Zwoele kerkpastoor | 51% | 230 |
| #5 | 𝔽𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕔 | 51% | 126 |
| #6 | Mr. Krabs | 50% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zwoele kerkpastoor | 66 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | 𝔽𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕔 | 40 | 0.0154 |
| #3 | Cracky blacks | 31 | 0.0146 |
| #4 | Mr. Krabs | 25 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | DZIWNY SM@RK NA FIRANCE | 11 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DZIWNY SM@RK NA FIRANCE | 599 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #2 | Zwoele kerkpastoor | 495 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #3 | 𝔽𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕔 | 383 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Cracky blacks | 259 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | Mr. Krabs | 218 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Choompie | +2.29 | 57 | 23 |
| #2 | OneMoreLine | +1.70 | 57 | 41 |
| #3 | 𝔽𝕣𝕖𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕔 | +1.34 | 51 | 40 |
| #4 | Cracky blacks | +0.70 | 50 | 76 |
| #5 | Zwoele kerkpastoor | +0.60 | 26 | 50 |





