










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 308 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
727 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,357 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 392 | 17% |
| Smokes | 624 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 864 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 477 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $251,451 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 472 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tero2502 | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | ThuysKieu | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Ning | 69% | 16 |
| #4 | h.tr4nq_ | 67% | 45 |
| #5 | ah1ko | 65% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K-Channn | 22 | 0.0221 |
| #2 | h.tr4nq_ | 12 | 0.0136 |
| #3 | Tero2502 | 7 | 0.0419 |
| #4 | VBL | 3 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | ah1ko | 3 | 0.0099 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K-Channn | 117 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | Ning | 66 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #3 | ThuysKieu | 56 | 0.28 | 1 min |
| #4 | VBL | 45 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | ah1ko | 25 | 0.08 | 1 min |





