








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3275 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1244 | 37% |
| Smokes | 683 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 621 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 802 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $711,929 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 79 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bob | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Divi Filius | 62% | 108 |
| #3 | arad.R | 61% | 114 |
| #4 | PaBo | 60% | 53 |
| #5 | Just a nice friendly old man | 60% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | platinum | +2.98 | 87 | 40 |
| #2 | 一匹オオカミ | +2.60 | 73 | 72 |
| #3 | Divi Filius | +1.64 | 48 | 63 |
| #4 | arad.R | +0.94 | 68 | 67 |
| #5 | Just a nice friendly old man | +0.44 | 62 | 56 |





