








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 575 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 221 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,727 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3577 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4802 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5268 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 6080 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,136,365 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 758 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moise | 76% | 49 |
| #2 | elviN | 70% | 46 |
| #3 | platinum | 60% | 106 |
| #4 | ⎛⎝ ≽ > ⩊ < ≼ ⎠⎞ | 59% | 59 |
| #5 | 一匹オオカミ | 59% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arad.R | 35 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Divi Filius | 31 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | PaBo | 17 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | platinum | 17 | 0.0078 |
| #5 | ⎛⎝ ≽ > ⩊ < ≼ ⎠⎞ | 17 | 0.0147 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 一匹オオカミ | +3.01 | 73 | 73 |
| #2 | platinum | +2.59 | 87 | 38 |
| #3 | elviN | +2.21 | 88 | 57 |
| #4 | Divi Filius | +2.10 | 50 | 65 |
| #5 | Moise | +1.47 | 75 | 75 |





