








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 798 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 244 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6038 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,315 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6727 | 35% |
| Smokes | 5445 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2838 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 4305 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $604,081 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | THEB1GDOGZ | 53% | 30 |
| #9 | EnfieLd | 52% | 64 |
| #10 | pugs | 48% | 106 |
| #11 | An4rchy | 45% | 49 |
| #12 | M | 41% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pugs | 23 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | copiN | 10 | 0.0188 |
| #3 | EnfieLd | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | THEB1GDOGZ | 4 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | catch me in dallas | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pugs | 426 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | catch me in dallas | 314 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | EnfieLd | 210 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | bpv | 196 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #5 | copiN | 138 | 0.26 | 3 min |





