








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3579 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 630 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1997 | 51% |
| HE Grenades | 1066 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 221 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $855,808 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KvassmanLv | 52% | 213 |
| #2 | HotCrab | 47% | 126 |
| #3 | op1´13 | 42% | 148 |
| #4 | TimelyCamera116 | 41% | 54 |
| #5 | Statecanvas2630 | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KvassmanLv | 52% | 213 |
| #2 | HotCrab | 47% | 126 |
| #3 | op1´13 | 42% | 148 |
| #4 | TimelyCamera116 | 41% | 54 |
| #5 | Statecanvas2630 | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HotCrab | 25 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | op1´13 | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | KvassmanLv | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Statecanvas2630 | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | TimelyCamera116 | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HotCrab | 819 | 0.31 | 18 min |
| #2 | op1´13 | 460 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | Statecanvas2630 | 175 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | TimelyCamera116 | 114 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | KvassmanLv | 71 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KvassmanLv | +1.78 | 39 | 22 |
| #2 | HotCrab | +1.10 | 51 | 61 |
| #3 | Gaabe1233 | -0.90 | 35 | 22 |
| #4 | op1´13 | -1.06 | 33 | 52 |
| #5 | TimelyCamera116 | -1.13 | 23 | 41 |





