








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 300 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2061 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,454 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2707 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2447 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1828 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1472 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $645,095 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tex | 61% | 102 |
| #2 | maxiw0w | 59% | 104 |
| #3 | 融合 | 55% | 148 |
| #4 | glada Mr. Allan MAX Ballan WHITE | 54% | 207 |
| #5 | Rizec | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tex | 61% | 102 |
| #2 | maxiw0w | 59% | 104 |
| #3 | 融合 | 55% | 148 |
| #4 | glada Mr. Allan MAX Ballan WHITE | 54% | 207 |
| #5 | Rizec | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maxiw0w | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | 融合 | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | glada Mr. Allan MAX Ballan WHITE | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Tex | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Rizec | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glada Mr. Allan MAX Ballan WHITE | 495 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | 融合 | 441 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | maxiw0w | 372 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | Tex | 315 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | Rizec | 34 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tex | +2.08 | 86 | 57 |
| #2 | maxiw0w | +1.89 | 66 | 62 |
| #3 | 融合 | +1.62 | 79 | 72 |
| #4 | theow0w | +1.30 | 79 | 68 |
| #5 | Rizec | -1.52 | 62 | 51 |





