








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 760 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 361 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2557 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1519 | 32% |
| Smokes | 312 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 1426 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1514 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,752 of utility $25 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1582 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breach★ | 48% | 153 |
| #2 | vaporstorm aka chad | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | ṨⱣΛϾΣṂΛṆ | 40% | 35 |
| #4 | CAMTHEWIZ | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 28% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breach★ | 48% | 153 |
| #2 | vaporstorm aka chad | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | ṨⱣΛϾΣṂΛṆ | 40% | 35 |
| #4 | CAMTHEWIZ | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 28% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breach★ | 13 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | vaporstorm aka chad | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | CAMTHEWIZ | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Breach★ | 649 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #2 | vaporstorm aka chad | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | ṨⱣΛϾΣṂΛṆ | 80 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | CAMTHEWIZ | 12 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CAMTHEWIZ | +4.79 | 56 | 32 |
| #2 | Breach★ | +2.48 | 57 | 53 |
| #3 | vaporstorm aka chad | +0.67 | 71 | 53 |
| #4 | BoogieWoogie | -0.99 | 32 | 28 |
| #5 | ṨⱣΛϾΣṂΛṆ | -3.52 | 6 | 32 |





