








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1115 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1100 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




98 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9879 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,208 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4204 | 15% |
| Smokes | 10389 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 6445 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6170 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,614,611 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 943 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DarkVenom | 50% | 62 |
| #2 | L.O.F.E | 50% | 292 |
| #3 | Jellyfish | 48% | 155 |
| #4 | Criffx | 48% | 67 |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 30% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DarkVenom | 50% | 62 |
| #2 | L.O.F.E | 50% | 292 |
| #3 | Jellyfish | 48% | 155 |
| #4 | Criffx | 48% | 67 |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 30% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jellyfish | 32 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | L.O.F.E | 19 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Criffx | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | DarkVenom | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L.O.F.E | 625 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | Jellyfish | 301 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Criffx | 38 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | DarkVenom | 23 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | <1Tapz>Bubbles | 2 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CAMTHEWIZ | +1.22 | 56 | 46 |
| #2 | Jellyfish | +1.09 | 54 | 44 |
| #3 | L.O.F.E | +0.25 | 45 | 58 |
| #4 | Criffx | -2.64 | 19 | 42 |
| #5 | DarkVenom | -3.34 | 18 | 27 |





