








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2074 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,648 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3575 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2290 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1941 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1842 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $567,586 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yux | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | kolmonen | 57% | 42 |
| #3 | MiuMau | 54% | 213 |
| #4 | Mäpsy | 52% | 220 |
| #5 | Loaf | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MiuMau | 54% | 213 |
| #4 | Mäpsy | 52% | 220 |
| #5 | Loaf | 45% | 31 |
| #6 | TeekeriNerska | 45% | 74 |
| #7 | PatFenis | 44% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mäpsy | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | MiuMau | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | TeekeriNerska | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | kolmonen | 4 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | PatFenis | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mäpsy | 984 | 0.22 | 27 min |
| #2 | MiuMau | 869 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #3 | TeekeriNerska | 166 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | kolmonen | 73 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | PatFenis | 35 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiuMau | +2.27 | 63 | 68 |
| #2 | Gwadi | +0.77 | 61 | 66 |
| #3 | Yux | +0.45 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | Mäpsy | -0.52 | 61 | 71 |
| #5 | PatFenis | -1.80 | 29 | 39 |





