








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
226 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 225 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 17 | 8% |
| Smokes | 92 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 20 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 96 | 43% |
Our logs show you have wasted $159,790 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Terraprisma | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | 2002 Dodge Neon | 47% | 30 |
| #3 | TnT_0925 | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | Intelligent Idiot | 42% | 24 |
| #5 | Damian butler | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Terraprisma | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | 2002 Dodge Neon | 47% | 30 |
| #3 | TnT_0925 | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | Intelligent Idiot | 42% | 24 |
| #5 | Damian butler | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Damian butler | 11 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | 2002 Dodge Neon | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Intelligent Idiot | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Terraprisma | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2002 Dodge Neon | 151 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #2 | Intelligent Idiot | 98 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #3 | TnT_0925 | 44 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | Damian butler | 20 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | Terraprisma | 17 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2002 Dodge Neon | +4.58 | 54 | 68 |
| #2 | Terraprisma | +2.20 | 77 | 40 |
| #3 | Damian butler | -0.45 | 17 | 12 |
| #4 | TnT_0925 | -1.18 | 8 | 45 |
| #5 | Wisper | -3.20 | 19 | 10 |





