








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 463 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




90 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2318 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,568 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1728 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1524 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2398 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1918 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $806,131 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Šlapina | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | Khal Ba | 55% | 42 |
| #3 | Avoid. | 50% | 20 |
| #4 | Dripposaurus Flex | 49% | 193 |
| #5 | Octavia Enjoyer | 48% | 152 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Avoid. | 50% | 20 |
| #4 | Dripposaurus Flex | 49% | 193 |
| #5 | Octavia Enjoyer | 48% | 152 |
| #6 | Kokot ve vzduchu | 46% | 151 |
| #7 | Jan Floydský | 44% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Octavia Enjoyer | 88 | 0.0297 |
| #2 | Dripposaurus Flex | 39 | 0.0106 |
| #3 | Kokot ve vzduchu | 38 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | Avoid. | 9 | 0.0221 |
| #5 | Jan Floydský | 6 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Octavia Enjoyer | 667 | 0.23 | 15 min |
| #2 | Dripposaurus Flex | 314 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Kokot ve vzduchu | 229 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Jan Floydský | 110 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Khal Ba | 106 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Octavia Enjoyer | +5.19 | 84 | 67 |
| #2 | Avoid. | +4.91 | 80 | 53 |
| #3 | Suiiiii | +1.69 | 66 | 52 |
| #4 | Dripposaurus Flex | +1.51 | 64 | 47 |
| #5 | Kokot ve vzduchu | -2.37 | 38 | 50 |





