








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
229 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 580 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 179 | 31% |
| Smokes | 136 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 148 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 117 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $35,850 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nycko | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | nick | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Piss baby | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | Karmajunkie | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nycko | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | nick | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Piss baby | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | Karmajunkie | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nycko | 43 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #2 | Piss baby | 14 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #3 | nick | 11 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #4 | Karmajunkie | 4 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VOLK TITLE RUN | +5.69 | 87 | 67 |
| #2 | nycko | +1.15 | 82 | 49 |
| #3 | nick | +1.08 | 55 | 55 |
| #4 | Karmajunkie | +0.84 | 90 | 67 |
| #5 | Piss baby | -1.17 | 55 | 49 |





