








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 137 matches | 1,936 | |
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 91 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,230 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3179 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3700 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2974 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3377 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,848,489 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1070 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Loflliツ | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Mavve | 58% | 95 |
| #3 | Salim | 58% | 255 |
| #4 | 3klikPhilip | 56% | 207 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Loflliツ | 66% | 38 |
| #2 | Mavve | 58% | 95 |
| #3 | Salim | 58% | 255 |
| #4 | 3klikPhilip | 56% | 207 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3klikPhilip | 16 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Salim | 14 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Loflliツ | 10 | 0.0113 |
| #4 | Mavve | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3klikPhilip | 581 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #2 | Salim | 287 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #3 | Mavve | 171 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Loflliツ | 134 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jn | +2.98 | 81 | 48 |
| #2 | Loflliツ | +2.29 | 85 | 66 |
| #3 | 3klikPhilip | +2.26 | 77 | 60 |
| #4 | Mavve | -1.35 | 65 | 37 |
| #5 | Salim | -2.84 | 51 | 45 |





