








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1346 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




85 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8951 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,061 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13802 | 43% |
| Smokes | 6593 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6656 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5010 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,648,622 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3166 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 犬 | 61% | 94 |
| #2 | unek :) | 51% | 171 |
| #3 | Ranian | 51% | 174 |
| #4 | 910 | 48% | 203 |
| #5 | kisälli | 48% | 249 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | unek :) | 51% | 171 |
| #3 | Ranian | 51% | 174 |
| #4 | 910 | 48% | 203 |
| #5 | kisälli | 48% | 249 |
| #6 | iTz | 46% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kisälli | 90 | 0.0184 |
| #2 | 910 | 27 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | Ranian | 19 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | unek :) | 14 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | 犬 | 12 | 0.0082 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kisälli | 808 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | Ranian | 643 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #3 | 910 | 581 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #4 | unek :) | 481 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #5 | iTz | 397 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 犬 | +3.00 | 70 | 62 |
| #2 | kattila | +2.08 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | Ranian | +1.00 | 50 | 48 |
| #4 | 910 | -0.64 | 57 | 54 |
| #5 | kisälli | -0.68 | 58 | 51 |





