








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 432 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 537 matches | ||
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5548 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,875 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4694 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6134 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2964 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 5083 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,321,485 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 947 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hibiscus | 52% | 46 |
| #2 | THEConterstrkr500lbWARRIORs0mple | 52% | 92 |
| #3 | monet | 51% | 61 |
| #4 | Jailman | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hibiscus | 52% | 46 |
| #2 | THEConterstrkr500lbWARRIORs0mple | 52% | 92 |
| #3 | monet | 51% | 61 |
| #4 | Jailman | 42% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jailman | 9 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | Hibiscus | 6 | 0.0091 |
| #3 | THEConterstrkr500lbWARRIORs0mple | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | monet | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THEConterstrkr500lbWARRIORs0mple | 349 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #2 | Jailman | 109 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | monet | 63 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Hibiscus | 13 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | monet | +3.94 | 50 | 64 |
| #2 | Hibiscus | +3.53 | 83 | 37 |
| #3 | THEConterstrkr500lbWARRIORs0mple | +2.02 | 65 | 68 |
| #4 | navy_jaguar | +0.30 | 31 | 54 |
| #5 | Jailman | -0.46 | 52 | 65 |





