








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 435 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 22 | 5% |
| Smokes | 93 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 86 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 234 | 54% |
Our logs show you have wasted $191,563 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ¿fin? | 48% | 33 |
| #2 | Curtis Coates | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | BigPeenKeen | 46% | 48 |
| #4 | Tom | 44% | 43 |
| #5 | monte | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ¿fin? | 48% | 33 |
| #2 | Curtis Coates | 46% | 28 |
| #3 | BigPeenKeen | 46% | 48 |
| #4 | Tom | 44% | 43 |
| #5 | monte | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | BigPeenKeen | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom | 135 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | ¿fin? | 85 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | BigPeenKeen | 73 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Curtis Coates | 38 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | monte | 5 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tom | +0.74 | 77 | 49 |
| #2 | Curtis Coates | +0.61 | 86 | 45 |
| #3 | BigPeenKeen | +0.51 | 83 | 40 |
| #4 | ¿fin? | -1.26 | 75 | 43 |
| #5 | Gibbo_ | -1.77 | 69 | 29 |





