










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 852 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 511 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6609 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,765 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2025 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3201 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3180 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2359 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,125,160 of utility $221 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 626 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SirWali | 50% | 38 |
| #2 | Quaky | 49% | 166 |
| #3 | Filippa | 48% | 328 |
| #4 | TROLLOGY | 48% | 63 |
| #5 | AssassinsFade | 46% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Quaky | 49% | 166 |
| #3 | Filippa | 48% | 328 |
| #4 | TROLLOGY | 48% | 63 |
| #5 | AssassinsFade | 46% | 56 |
| #6 | 𝐓𝐢 MDXi | 44% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quaky | 15 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Filippa | 10 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | SirWali | 5 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | TROLLOGY | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TROLLOGY | 325 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | Filippa | 252 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #3 | Quaky | 231 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | 𝐓𝐢 MDXi | 124 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | AssassinsFade | 100 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quaky | +2.18 | 72 | 44 |
| #2 | 𝐓𝐢 MDXi | +1.80 | 70 | 68 |
| #3 | SirWali | +1.33 | 56 | 45 |
| #4 | Karpos | +0.85 | 76 | 43 |
| #5 | TROLLOGY | -1.60 | 64 | 56 |





