








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 728 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5698 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,165 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6151 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4415 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4356 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4243 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,659,383 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 874 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Its_Je_Mattie | 73% | 37 |
| #2 | hetrix | 66% | 44 |
| #3 | Barney 'bait for it' Stinson (or | 63% | 68 |
| #4 | Fragotelli | 59% | 37 |
| #5 | sIcK fLicK rIcK | 59% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sh4x | 11 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Jequayus Jamal Jacobious | 7 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | hetrix | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | sIcK fLicK rIcK | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Fragotelli | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sIcK fLicK rIcK | 296 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #2 | Sh4x | 199 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | hetrix | 194 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | Barney 'bait for it' Stinson (or | 189 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Fragotelli | 59 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hetrix | +4.83 | 77 | 69 |
| #2 | eL rátton | +2.73 | 72 | 63 |
| #3 | Its_Je_Mattie | +0.68 | 71 | 54 |
| #4 | Sh4x | +0.17 | 64 | 55 |
| #5 | Barney 'bait for it' Stinson (or | -0.37 | 65 | 54 |





