








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 413 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 327 matches | ||
| Wingman | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 140 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,645 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6603 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5162 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4557 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4323 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,072,524 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 385 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | b0nde | 43% | 30 |
| #13 | DunderNicky | 42% | 31 |
| #14 | Senapsguden | 41% | 51 |
| #15 | rawKin | 38% | 53 |
| #16 | nitrog | 34% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nitrog | 6 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Axghd | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | b0nde | 4 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Salbohed.♿ | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | cprp | 3 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Axghd | 480 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | morfarS | 227 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | rawKin | 220 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Lucifer | 181 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | Salbohed.♿ | 179 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cprp | +3.65 | 86 | 55 |
| #2 | Skilliam | +3.21 | 59 | 67 |
| #3 | Matte | +3.00 | 70 | 78 |
| #4 | Foy | +2.94 | 84 | 51 |
| #5 | b0nde | +2.30 | 71 | 70 |





