








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 543 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2703 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,947 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1296 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1266 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1534 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1851 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,093,113 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bijanali | 51% | 35 |
| #2 | Ponglenis | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 43% | 69 |
| #4 | Wuchtel | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bijanali | 51% | 35 |
| #2 | Ponglenis | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 43% | 69 |
| #4 | Wuchtel | 41% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Bijanali | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 309 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | Bijanali | 144 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #3 | Wuchtel | 89 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ponglenis | 39 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Ecl1pZ | +1.86 | 73 | 49 |
| #2 | Wuchtel | +1.83 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | Ponglenis | +0.44 | 69 | 67 |
| #4 | Bijanali | -1.21 | 52 | 60 |
| #5 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | -2.51 | 36 | 77 |





