








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3547 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,048 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 748 | 11% |
| Smokes | 1454 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2424 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 2422 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,913,661 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xantares | 55% | 78 |
| #2 | rutles | 53% | 150 |
| #3 | Yoriichi Tsugikuni | 51% | 126 |
| #4 | BOT Fucking Mäyrä | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | balkanrage | 49% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoriichi Tsugikuni | 480 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | rutles | 339 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | 76561198148706246 | 212 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | xantares | 198 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | balkanrage | 101 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoriichi Tsugikuni | +4.55 | 79 | 68 |
| #2 | xantares | +2.37 | 65 | 44 |
| #3 | BOT Fucking Mäyrä | +2.21 | 86 | 66 |
| #4 | ✪ rosu | +1.90 | 83 | 54 |
| #5 | rutles | +1.63 | 52 | 42 |





