








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1975 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,887 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 245 | 13% |
| Smokes | 303 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 707 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 632 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,143,454 of utility $242 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 157 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hey | 55% | 29 |
| #2 | hartsi hare | 48% | 79 |
| #3 | macuin | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | SaintPeter | 41% | 132 |
| #5 | raitis | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hey | 55% | 29 |
| #2 | hartsi hare | 48% | 79 |
| #3 | macuin | 48% | 40 |
| #4 | SaintPeter | 41% | 132 |
| #5 | raitis | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SaintPeter | 14 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | hartsi hare | 10 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | macuin | 3 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | hey | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SaintPeter | 715 | 0.26 | 13 min |
| #2 | hartsi hare | 163 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | hey | 112 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | macuin | 98 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | raitis | 35 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SaintPeter | +3.08 | 64 | 65 |
| #2 | macuin | +0.75 | 63 | 66 |
| #3 | hartsi hare | +0.33 | 66 | 59 |
| #4 | hey | +0.02 | 69 | 56 |
| #5 | Olaf | -1.58 | 56 | 27 |





