








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 470 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2484 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,011 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3167 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3722 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2657 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2465 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $427,394 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 422 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neddwardo | 67% | 55 |
| #2 | munchy | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | br0ck- | 59% | 39 |
| #4 | bugsthebunny | 48% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neddwardo | 67% | 55 |
| #2 | munchy | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | br0ck- | 59% | 39 |
| #4 | bugsthebunny | 48% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neddwardo | 10 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | br0ck- | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | munchy | 5 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | bugsthebunny | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | br0ck- | 335 | 0.42 | 10 min |
| #2 | munchy | 91 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | neddwardo | 82 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | bugsthebunny | 82 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | br0ck- | +1.59 | 80 | 87 |
| #2 | munchy | +1.57 | 75 | 57 |
| #3 | neddwardo | +1.06 | 77 | 47 |
| #4 | bugsthebunny | +0.87 | 85 | 61 |
| #5 | p3y | +0.80 | 82 | 63 |





